Monday, February 09, 2009

what is there to say

There is little of interest in my life right now.

Three years have passed along with two positions at two different funeral homes. Now, no job. I'm going to school full time and need to find some part time work to support this habit.

Perhaps the funeral industry is not for me. I am of service to families, great service, I know, but I can not seem to play well with others. Am I at fault for their stupidity? I think not. Am I to blame for their inability to manage well? Again, I think not. However, I am fully responsible for my own inability to shut the hell up and do what I'm told. I don't know why it's so difficult for me.

Two years have passed and I am now re-taking anger management. Actually this time I'm co-leading the class. Does that mean I'm really, really angry?

Three months have passed since the end of my job. I am in a place of utter confusion and chaos. How did I land here again? How much therapy can one soul need?

Five years have passed since I quit the high-tech industry and began my floundering. Is this growth? It seems that my life is paralelling my 17-yr-old daughter's. College next year for her and the beginning of a new phase. At 43, I should not be at a beginning stage. I should know where I am headed. I should be secure in a career. I should not be so lost.


Patience said...

Glad you're back! I'd just about given up on you until I was looking for one of my old posts. You had left a comment, so I decided to see if you were still around!

Y'know, we are always at the beginning stage. Life is always about new beginnings! Secure in a career?? I'm not sure that type of security even exists, especially in this economic disaster we've created for ourselves!

Always remember, one door may close, but another door will open . . . if we let it!

noelle said...

hi Patience,
I'd just about given up myself! lol. It's been a heck of a ride. Thanks for stopping by and for your words of wisdom and encouragement!